My son is away on a four day trip with his senior class. I miss him sooooooo much and I need K's and funny posts. Funny pictures will do too!

no K for ya...
u gotta learn it the austere way...

Ks are like respect-- something earned, not given.

But have a K!

Funny pictures will do too!

Go to Baltic-a-thon.

Ks are like respect-- something earned, not given.

But have a K!

And yet you were kind enough to part with a K. A little picture reward for you and a K!

You know there are these things called cell phones.

I know this because my mother got me one...because I stopped my phone service in 2000...she pays the 10 bucks to put me on the family plan...not that I want it...but I keep it for her sake.

Best thing I ever did and I don't miss it.

People at work wondered at the time how I could get along with out it...

I said..fuck just IM or email me...is anything really that important that you need to talk to me right away.

They were like...what about an emergency...and I was like...well I'll guess I'll just die then, eh.

Uh Mouse....I can't call him. He's out and about with his friends....this mother knows her bounderies and refuses to intrude on his good time. But here's a picture of me from twenty years ago...go ahead and make fun of it...I need the laugh.

Meechie92 wrote:

Uh Mouse....I can't call him. He's out and about with his friends....this mother knows her bounderies and refuses to intrude on his good time. But here's a picture of me from twenty years ago...go ahead and make fun of it...I need the laugh.

Ah don't worry honey...I'd still bone you today

Ah don't worry honey...I'd still bone you today

Check out my 80'a hair....I'm sure some of your photo choppers could do something with this.

This is my dog Sam...he misses my son too.

:D

Meechie this oughta get a laugh..

Oldsquid wrote:

Meechie this oughta get a laugh..

I'm sooooo lonely....I need K's


.... do ya need batteries too?

Outie.

You got better boobs than any of them.








Did I mention you got nice tits?


Well, you got REALLY nice tits!




What was the question?

We in-tit-rrupt this thread to bring you some last minute tits.

OldLyme wrote:

Outie.

I was thinking about a 'Innie'!

Some jokes for you, Meechie (you said you needed some laughs)

Beautiful Garden

A beautiful young lady loved fresh, vine-ripened tomatoes, but couldn't seem to get them to turn red. Frustrated, she asked her next door neighbor, a retired gentlemen who had a garden full of huge red tomatoes, for advice.

"How do you get your tomatoes so red?" she asked.

The gentleman smiled. "Twice a day I stand in front of my tomatoes and expose myself. They turn red from blushing so much."

The young woman was dubious, but was willing to try anything. So twice a day for next week she exposed herself to her garden.

A few days later, the gentlemen leaned across the fence and asked, "Well? Did your tomatoes turn red?"

"No," she replied, "but my cucumbers are enormous."


Sergeant Benny

Sergeant Benny had been in Afghanistan for the last year. The day he got back, his wife and children were at the airport to pick him up. He strode through the gates and got into the car.

He looked straight at his wife. "FF," he said.

His wife turned to him and shook her head. "EF," she replied.

His wife pulled out on the highway and Sergeant Benny cleared his throat. "FF!" he said again.

She responded simply, "EF."

"FF!" he repeated loudly.

Again she replied, "EF."

"Mom! Dad!" yelled their son. "What's going on?"

Sergeant Benny answered, "Your mother wants to eat first!"

Meechie92 wrote:

My son is away on a four day trip with his senior class. I miss him sooooooo much and I need K's.

Who am I to blame someone to be karma whoring?

(even if pimping your own flesh and blood is a bit over the top )


But you must promise you won't spend the K on booze.

Another one, Meechie.

John woke up with a pounding hangover. The first thing he saw was a glass of water and two aspirin on the night table, with a note. The note read, "Honey, your breakfast is in the oven. I've gone shopping, then I'm going over to check on your mother. See you this Afternoon. Love you!""

Painfully John tiptoed down the hallway to the kitchen, where he saw his son, Chip drinking a glass of orange juice.

"Dad, you sure were a mess last night," Chip commented.

John eased his omelet out of the oven and sat down carefully. "What did I do?"

Chip shrugged. "You came in about 1:30, singing "All My Rowdy Friends" at the top of your lungs - AFTER parking the car in the middle of Mom's roses. You stumbled to the bathroom to throw up and completely MISSED the commode, spewing everything on the floor. And your best pair of pants has a rip in the bottom that Mom says can't be fixed."

"Wow!" John marveled. "I'll bet your Mom was mad."

"Oh, she was furious," Chip nodded.

"So why is she so nice to me now?" John asked.

"Oh, that," Chip shrugged. "When she tried to take off your pants and get you in bed, you shouted, 'Lady, Stop It! I'm married!'"

korbach wrote:


Let's recall this fucking dating website fuckbook.

You and dagon could just get a room.